THESE STREETS
So my parents are back from Florida. They had a good time and everything went off without a hitch. Work has slowed again to a grind (surprise, surprise).
So I dusted off one of my old CD's - Savatage's "Streets: A Rock Opera". This CD was GLUED in cd player back in the old Fargo days. Dark days, long DEPRESSING days, I lisetened to it everyday for about 6 months. The album has every theme. The rise of a young upshot, the fall, the misteps, and in the end, redemption. I was listening to it on my way to our meeting with the pastor at our church. As soon as the few chords blared out of my speakers I knew why I love this cd so much. It will prolly be another 6 months now. The one HUGE song on this album is the last song "Believe". When my father almost drank himself to death, I gave it to him for inspiration. Everytime I hear it, it's like shooting an arrow through my heart. It means that much to me.
The music covers all the emotions. On the way to pick up my parents I just about broke down - it affected me that much. The universal story of broken dreams and redemption is still very powerful. I guess when I first got this album there was a lot of shit in my life and now I can look back and see the dusted road where I have emerged and to see the sun again - I feel blessed. This was also the last album of guitarist virtuoso Criss Oliva. It just makes the music that much more important and somber.
This is why music means so much to me. It just touches a chord, and makes me think, makes me feel. Music has gotten me thorugh so many rough spots in my life, it has become my crutch. It's always there for me. Neer to judge, it speaks to me the words I need to hear, it keeps me putting one foot in front of the other - pushing forward. It makes me BELIEVE in something greater than myself.
*the song - Can You Hear Me Now comes on*
So I've been working on getting my shit together for my consulting comapny. I'm going to take a real stab at getting it going. As much as I would like to start a magazine, or write a book, this is something I can throw myself and all my skills into - and make $$$$$ in the process. To boot, it's something I can do in my off time and weekends. Don't know how the gif is going to take that - but we'll see.
So life goal #235, get your consultating business off it's feet and moving.
ok - the music is getting too strong for me. I can't listen and type at the same time. So here's some flavor for you to think about:
New York City Don't Mean Nothing Lyrics
I've been here since '81
That's a long time
I've seen all there is to see
Had a space on Astor Place
Had it all once
Now these streets
Are my reality
Because
New York City
Don't mean nothing
It's just a good place when you're running
Lights they cut so bright they make you bleed
Neon children live their lives there
Mad magicians tinsel nightmares
Still you know I'm never gonna leave
Never sleep alone on the subway
Never walk alone on the tracks
Never take a ride to the edge of your mind
Unless you've got a ticket back
Don't believe in T.V. preachers
Don't believe in talk show stars
Never follow trends if they turn on your friends
Just be sure you know who your friends are
'Cause if you're running blind
On a refueled mind
Better watch the time
Careful you don't go too far
Never burn the bridges before you
Never burn the bridges behind
Don't burn the one that you're walking on
Gonna hit the water in time
Don't believe in expectations
Don't believe in shooting stars
If you make a stand on a dead empty hand
Never let 'em see your cards
'Cause if you're running blind
On a refueled mind
Better watch the time
Careful you don't go too far
Too far
Can't you hear...
New York City
Don't mean nothing
It's just a good place when you're running
Still you know I'm never gonna leave
What a great line for a rock song - "Never take a ride to the edge of your mind, Unless you got a ticket back."
I'll take about my Red Devils tomorrow. . .too far in the emotion of this album.
Now I just sit back in this chair,
Lean back,
and listen to Criss tangle his web of guitar licks
and let the emotion roll over me like a waterfall,
and loose myself again,
LATERS
POWERFUL PAINS
Wow, 1 week to the day since my last post. Not to bad, I'd say. I thought it had been longer, but I guess that happens when things are going well. Oh well, some strange things that have happened in the past week. . .
After my last post, I put together a "thank you" letter to my father. I've done a few of these in the past years for my Mom and my Dad. After the show on Dale Jr, I just felt compelled to write and let him know how much I love him and how important he still is in my life. It was tough, I wrote the letter while I was still at work. There were a few times when I started to break down and cry - but held back the tears. I saw my Dad that weekend and we had a nice embrace and he had some kind words for me. I did it because we go through this crazy life and never stop and tell the people how much they mean to us until it's too late or they are dead.
Another profund experience I've been having lately is this heavy hearted feeling when dealing with older people. They sit in my office and tell me about the "good old days" of things were more simple. I like it, and at the same time I feel these powerful waves of emotion and pain come over me. I think it's probably my thoughts that the post WWII generation has all but disappeared. Peter Jennings wrote a book called, "The Greatest Generation" which chronicled this generation. Their remarkable accomplishments, their pride, and their honor. My heart grows heavy for these people. They were brought up with a whole different set of values and expectations. That morality and set of values have all but vanished over the past ten years. Were the techno savey generation. Internet plugged in, anything you want, anytime, anyplace. There are no more limitations on the children growing up. Is the world changing before my eyes? You bet. Is there anything I can do to stop it? Probably not.
One strong feeling I have is that technology is taking over. All the movies were "cyborgs" rule the earth and battle us humans is surreal, but not far away. We are at the top of the food chain, we can't stay there foever. Even the dinosaurs lasted for thousands of years. At the current rate, I doubt we will last that long. Although I don't endorse what the una-bomber did, his points in his "manifesto" were valid. Technology is taking over and we have no thoughts of slowing down the machine that infiltrates and is in every house, in daily use. What happens when this system becomes "aware" of its own existence? By then, it will be too late.
So as I ramble on, I cannot come to any conclusions on how to remedy my feelings. I can only use this blog as an outlet for these thoughts. Right or wrong.
I'll have another entry tomorrow or the next day on this election and how we are doomed if John Kerry is elected. Although the one interesting thing is that both Kerry and Bush are fellow Bonesmen from Yale.
Since my brain is drained - I'll continue on tomorrow.
THANK YOU - GOODNIGHT!
LONG DAYS, DARK NIGHTS
What a strange few days it has been. My gif and I had a row about having children and getting married. I came home last night after work and basically stayed downstairs working on my toasted computer and watching tv until she went to bed.
While I was switching channels, I came across the VH1 "Driven" show. It was featuring Dale Earnhardt Jr. and his rise through the Busch and Winston ranks. One of the most emotional things was when he father passed while they were both racing in Daytona. It really hit me pretty hard. I could tell the guy had a very special realtionship with his father, and he was crushed when he was taken from him in a flash. It really made me think about how special I am to have the father I do. it made me think of all the great times we had while I was going up and the things that he instilled in me to carry on for the rest of my life. I prayed last night, for the first time in a long time. Some times we just don't see what we have and we don't realize how soon all of it can be taken away.
I surely am lucky.
LATE
REDEMPTION
The last few days I've been suffering from a sinus infection. It seems that I've become quite a crass person because of this infection. Oh well, lots going on, so let's get to it.
The movie "MIRACLE" opens this weekend, The movie is about the 1980 US Olympic team and how they conquered the Russians and got the gold in Lake Placid. Since most of the guys were from Minnesota, the press coverage around here has been crazy. Marc Rosen, who is a local sports guy was actually there and had some amazing memories that he has shared throughout the week.
I think that the loss of Herb Brooks is finally starting to sink in. With the movie, the memories I had as a young child watching that game when the Us played Russia - it still gives me goosbumps and chills down my spine. There will be a dedication of a bronze statue of Herb Brooks this weekend. He was just a courageous man and did soooo much for hockey here in Minnesota. Whenever I think of him - the Frank Sinatra song "I Did It My Way" comes to mind.
So I also saw Bob Dole on the "Daily Show" yesterday. The guy just cracks me up. I have all the respect and admiration for him. You can tell the guy has had quite a career as a senator. I was watching this guy and just thinking how much I admired him to run for president, get beat and then just simply go back to doing what he does. One of the questions John Stewart asked him was if there is more bickering and arguing than in the past. Dole said that there was. All you have to do is took look in the media and find that both houses could use some counseling.
That brings me to my next point. What the fuck is wrong with politics?? Maybe it's that a bit older, a bit smarter. I read more than I did in college, and seem to be more informed. I look at myself as an independent. But the shit I see in the news about Bush just drives me nuts. This whole ordeal over Iraq is just shocking. So what the fuck do you think Saddam was going to do when he had a nuke? Where do you think the first place he'd lob one? Probably Isreal or the US. He already had a nuclear facility and the Isreali's bombed it into rubble. Why do you think they did that huh? For people not to think that he was a viable threat - then they need to wake up and smell the coffee. Even Rush Limbaugh had several Democrats that were in full supoort of invading and neutralizing Saddam. Now they seem to be singing a defferent tune. Funny how politics can warp things sometimes.
Oh well - enough of my ranting. I'm just really sick and tired of these things that should not be an issue. Politics is politics. I guess I'd love a chance to get in their and grill the fuck outa some of these people that all of a sudden thought that invading Iraq was a bad idea.
Oh well - business calls.
TOAST
