THE NEGATIVE REACTION

IT HAS YOU. . .

Finally got to see the "Animatrix" DVD last night. WOW what a mind bender. . . if you have a chance to go see this - I would HIGHLY recommend it.

The last few days I have attempted to stop and smell the proverbial flowers. The book I have referred to earlier is playing on my brain again. Seeing as how I had approximately two years of my life ripped from my memory - those being my final two years of college life, I will always wonder what would have been different. What could have been, where would I be now. It keeps me awake (for instance, the last two nights) and constantly thinking that I have missed my whole life, never appreciating much that has come by my good luck. My son has changed my life dramatically. Although I was never ready for it, he has had a profound effect on my life. Something that, if his mother has her way, will never know.

So more dribble about the menaing of life - huh?? Oh well, it has consumed me for the past few days and I have thus been unable to shake it. What eats at me even more is what I would like to do with my life (even now,a s I enter my mid 30's). I have so much creativity bottled up, I dont know where to store it anymore. I LOVE photography, I love digital art, I love trance music. Anything that can set my soul free from these human restraints is what drives me.

What is out there? What have I missed? I feel like I have been sprinting for so many years, now I stop on this deserted road, turn around and everything I knew has lost its meaning. Where to go, what to do?

More Dribble
These days they linger
only in memory
light into darkness
darkness into light
what changes?
what remains,
pictures, memories?
one shot
one life
one soul
he waits for no one
but my time is short
I will stop
and let it engulf me
forever more
this words spill out
of my soul
the time is late now
and I must press on


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